I know that I just released a schedule for a whole new format for the blog – and I apologize to those who were looking forward to it – but I need to take a break from this blog. Those of you who have been with me since the beginning, you know that this is not abnormal for me. Generally it’s just a case of writer’s block and is over quickly – that is not the case this time around.
I have been struggling for months with this blog, putting so much of myself into it and hearing near silence in return. It has been immeasurably difficult to write the Palestinian posts because while you – the reader – are able to read and walk away I do not have the same luxury. Each post that I write is a trigger – in the true sense of the word – and I am brought back to those moments and feel the fear, shame, guilt, outrage, anger, hopelessness and despair as if I were re-living what occurred all over again. I also do not have the luxury of allowing my mind to pull away from the material, I have to slow those moments of suffering down and examine them so that I can find the right words to give life to it.
I have pushed myself forward, arguing that it was important for these stories to get out – and without a doubt the are – but I so often feel that I am writing into the void. As an artist – a writer – that feeling is … discouraging, to say the least. I write, create, to provoke thought from you – to start discussion, that is what all art is about.
You are here for a reason, right? I invite you, welcome you, urge you to comment – even if you tell me I’m full of shit. There is a human being behind this screen – one that yearns for community, and part of being in a community is feedback, input and conversation. Please… engage with me. To those few who have, I thank you – you have no idea how much encouragement your comments give and how much they mean to me.
Signing off for now..